E FRIEND

You have no idea what so ever that I've been saving our chats. I used to. Each one of them.

I lost a lot of those chat logs because I thought they were saved on the messenger. I regret that.

But as many as I have - are precious to me.

I read them often. It really breaks my heart to know that that friendship somehow unknowingly dissolved.

You an incredibly awesome person!

Very very dear to me.

Very very special.

I wish I get to talk to you like it was earlier :)

Heart flutters

I really hate the part when after having made a good effort @ avoiding distracting destroying my feelings for someone - I start over with just the same feelings  with maybe even more intensity than before.

A combination of butterflies in stomach & a little occasional heartbreaks.

Its not easy to survive that amalgamation.

I can be.

I can still live a better life. I can still raise my own standard. My own ability , capablity & confidence.

I can be - whatever I want to be.

And I must strive for excellence. Life is gotta be beautiful. Even if it ain't naturally too pretty.

Smart. Huh?

Why do women / girls act smart around guys ?

Why are they so focused on revealing a side of them that isn't theirs!

Why lady , why can't ya just be yourself ?

Maybe..I too tend to get hyper around guys. I act strange , weird , a little different.I talk stupid.Shy.Blush
But I don't pretend anything. Nor do I act like a smartass!

I fucking hate to see my own friends be the jackass!

Its weird to sit around them and listen to their yarns! I don't understand how guys bear it!!

Bah! Does a guy even listen  when he's sitting across a pretty girl ? So mesmerized that he can swallow any form of bullshit.

Balls!

Mother

I will make a great mom one day.
Although I don't intend to have kids ever...but then whenever I do - I would just make a great mother.

And  I want a daughter.

I'll give her every bit of freedom that I've been denied. I will be her best friend. Her soul sister.

Everything that I wanted my mom to be. And she'll be the daughter my mom always wanted.