How much can you empty yourself out.
Friday, June 29, 2012
Monday, June 11, 2012
On Hold.
Its is wicked how I think of you at weird moments.
While tying the shoe laces.
While filling the water cooler.
While flipping channels.
No matter how much I deny myself a right to relive the memories..I still find myself thinking about you - almost like a lightening bolt - all of a sudden , fierce and scary - a pang so powerful it drains me out.
You take away the smile from me.
It is raining. I hate to think of you when I watch the sky drizzling.
It reminds me of a time dimension when nothing had happened.
When I would crave for you just as much as I did yesterday or maybe even today.
You fill me up with a heavy heart.
A burden so strong...the rain from my eyes begin to pour down.
Tell me why you're gone.
Tell me why haven't you withdrawn.
While tying the shoe laces.
While filling the water cooler.
While flipping channels.
No matter how much I deny myself a right to relive the memories..I still find myself thinking about you - almost like a lightening bolt - all of a sudden , fierce and scary - a pang so powerful it drains me out.
You take away the smile from me.
It is raining. I hate to think of you when I watch the sky drizzling.
It reminds me of a time dimension when nothing had happened.
When I would crave for you just as much as I did yesterday or maybe even today.
You fill me up with a heavy heart.
A burden so strong...the rain from my eyes begin to pour down.
Tell me why you're gone.
Tell me why haven't you withdrawn.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Friday, April 6, 2012
I'm erasing you. Slowly and gradually I'm sure I will completely write you off.
I get stuck on whether I should forgive you or not.
If I don't..a part of you will always remain with me. If I do , it would mean letting you and all the baggage along with it - go. Just let go ..fade away with layers of dust.So that I would never be able to withdraw the envelopes.
That would be a good thing to do..but then I wonder why is it not coming easy to forgive you ?
I've reached a point where I don't demand answers. I guess there is nothing to answer.
And that is changing things.. that is to say even when I am hurting every time I think of all this..I hardly cry. I hardly yell inside.
Not wanting to know anything anymore has turned into a mechanism of its own kind - leaving me bittersweet , yet helping me pull along , pushing me to give up and move on.
It will always be a sad end for me. I took chances.So maybe there is nothing to regret. I didn't want to believe you were bad because that is the extent to which I liked you.
Just liked you , a lot lot , but only liked.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Wish you'd known that and having known that , had some respect for our relation.
I could only wish. Its that sad.
I get stuck on whether I should forgive you or not.
If I don't..a part of you will always remain with me. If I do , it would mean letting you and all the baggage along with it - go. Just let go ..fade away with layers of dust.So that I would never be able to withdraw the envelopes.
That would be a good thing to do..but then I wonder why is it not coming easy to forgive you ?
I've reached a point where I don't demand answers. I guess there is nothing to answer.
And that is changing things.. that is to say even when I am hurting every time I think of all this..I hardly cry. I hardly yell inside.
Not wanting to know anything anymore has turned into a mechanism of its own kind - leaving me bittersweet , yet helping me pull along , pushing me to give up and move on.
It will always be a sad end for me. I took chances.So maybe there is nothing to regret. I didn't want to believe you were bad because that is the extent to which I liked you.
Just liked you , a lot lot , but only liked.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Wish you'd known that and having known that , had some respect for our relation.
I could only wish. Its that sad.
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