I wanted to mark him my territory. I wanted to stamp him mine.
There were no questions about insecurities. I knew already I'd loose him. But not now. Not today. Not here. Not at this moment , I thought.
There was only a fever of possession growing exponentially every passing minute.
Time was ticking away too fast.
And then I ran out of lives in this game that I played.
He already belonged to someone else.
It hurts me to see him heartbroken. But I can't tend to his wounds. I have my own to cater to. And even if I want to...wouldn't that add salt to mine ?
I fight so hard to not be in love. I choose not loving. And I don't even want to know whether I'm really in love or not. I don't wish to contemplate over that.
But there's obviously some feeling some bond some magic that wishes to come out of its shell and get wrapped up in the warmth of this friendship.
However the feeling isn't reciprocated. I don't know what will change if it does. Probably make me happier ? And that's about it. Because there's nothing more that I want to take it from that point. I'm being selfish. And yet I so badly yearn for it to be given back to me.
Once.
Just once.
Maybe then I can lend him a shoulder to cry on.
Fill his wounds , unkowingly how he could fill mine.
